Trivium Pursuit

Thoughts on Courtship, Dating and the Family

The following is taken from the Parenting with Purpose web site. Thank you J.A.

…So courtship or dating? Well, neither is taught in scripture as the only way to go. But principles are throughout scripture teaching what our conduct should be like as Believers in Christ. So, to sum up the advice we as parents give our kids…

1. Build healthy friendships viewing the other person as precious to God and a sister or brother in Christ to you.

2. Be respectful and kind, but clearly communicate when you have no interest in pursuing a relationship.

3. Look out for one another (siblings) and help one another. Brothers, protect your sisters.

4. Before pursuing any relationship further, make sure the person LOVES the Lord Jesus Christ and wants to always live for Him. Make sure they have a healthy relationship with their own family and want to get to know yours — taking the time and effort to do that (and visa versa). I always tell my boys, “Any girl worth having (as a wife), is worth working for!”

5. Look for a stable person who is not always discontent, but lives his or her purpose exactly where the Lord has them and who believes in biblical roles for the family.

6. For girls, look for a young man who LOVES God’s word and is willing to lead in studying it together daily. For boys, look for a young lady who LOVES God’s word and is willing to have you lead in studying together.

7. Look for a praying person — someone with an on-going relationship with the Lord, not just a person counting on their own wisdom for decisions in life. One of the best things we ever did was to start out our marriage by praying together before we go to sleep each night. That has been a big blessing through the years! I highly recommend it!

8. Look for a person who is willing to have boundaries in dating/courtship and someone who is honest about it.

9. Look for a person who has the same Biblical convictions as you and is not in another system or method of beliefs. One who is always willing to study the word of God for direction — not referencing as their source of truth, the writings or words of other people past or present. We have the word of God and that is our only source of absolute truth.

10. Live for the Lord Jesus Christ in all you do. Be the best “you” you can be for the glory of Jesus Christ. Be all the things and do all the things you would want in a spouse. Live scripture, put others first, in all situations seek to do what is best pleasing to the Lord Jesus the Messiah!

One Response to “Thoughts on Courtship, Dating and the Family”

  1. Jenny Says:

    Good advice. It’s nice that you’re open with your children’s choices about this. Do you mind sharing what directions they’ve taken? Thanks.

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